Give & Take or Giving & Receiving?

Two very different dynamics, aren’t they?  You felt it even as your eyes lit on the words.

Give and Take is a duality.  It feels to me like a see-saw.  One’s up, the other’s down.  I loved the see-saw as a kid.  Ever try balancing in the middle?  Working with your partner to find just that sweet spot where you’re level?  One might have to scootch up a bit, the other back a bit.  Always duality, though, no matter how much the two work together.

Giving & Receiving is circular, never-ending, expansive.  At dinner last night, a small sushi place, a toddler greeted everyone enthusiastically, Hi!…and when anyone left, she called out, Bye!  I doubt you’ll have to exercise many imagining brain cells to guess what happened when she received Hi’s and Bye’s back, and when she didn’t.

In giving, a greeting, a gift, a smile, a moment, there must be a receiver.

And what does religion and the synthetic construct teach?  It’s better to give than receive, yes?

The false g.o.d. takes what earnest hearted people give, and stunts their receiving as being selfish.  Oh, no, thanks, I couldn’t….

When we receive…
~ we allow and accept the gift of the giver
~ in so doing, we gift the giver by being a receiver
~ and transform into a giver, ourselves
~ the original giver receives our heartfelt acknowledgement and thanks, completing a circuit, connecting hearts
~ which gains momentum for more giving, and more receiving, and more circuits completed, and more connection….

I imagine a spirograph…ever have one of those as a kid?…making a circle, starting at the bottom of the first circle, then drawing up and right, over the top, and coming down swinging over to make another circle, connecting to the next and next and next until the flower is complete back at the starting point.  I so wish I could draw it for you, but I suspect our innate connection with sacred shapes will fill in the blanks.  Lovely, isn’t it?

And it actually begins with receiving.

We’re all givers.  We’re wired to share. Sharing is not just living, it’s primal.  It’s connection.  Connection is survival.

How dastardly, really, to subvert the connection by denying us receivers of our gifts!

Taking it a step further, how damaging is it to cope with this lack of a healthy dynamic, expressing instead as hidden agendas attached to giving, thus injecting distrust.  There is a saying in the professional fundraising field: Beware the gift that keeps on taking….

The question then becomes one of discernment — giving and taking? or giving and receiving?

Is the tightness in our gut when gifted an alarm bell or is it our own disjointed relationship with receiving?

Within the dynamic, and it is dynamic, this revolving exchange, we may misperceive giving as active and receiving as passive, and that’s what feels uncomfortable.  It’s almost like listless sex, only one party is engaged.  Or like one of those horrible limp fish handshakes.  C’mon!  Make it real!  The bias against receiving is lodged here, seems to me…in passivity.  Engage receiving!  Take it out of park or neutral.  Meet the giving with equal measure to ignite the dynamic, complete the circuit, and spark the creative connection…the connection that creates and sustains life.

As I focus on rebuilding my foundation in the organic, off-kilter aspects of myself are surfacing to be rebalanced, recalibrated, and re-energized to re-align with wholeness.

This is a big one.

So, thank you for reading, for commenting, for being here to receive my sharing!  From my heart to yours, thank you for the connection :)! xo




© 2015, Elz. All rights reserved.


  1. So thoughtful and thought provoking! I will be observing my feelings more closely as I give and receive. Thank you again for shining a light on something that should be so simple and easy!

    1. Thanks for your comment, Liz! You’re so right on with simple and easy…shall we make up a new word? Simpleasy! ;D I think I’m going to use that, thank you!

    1. Thank you, so much, Adrian! It is a cycle, isn’t it? That word triggers the electrical sense where the speed of completion of circuits is measured in cycles. Love it! :)

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